Are Monkey Whizz Synthetic Urine Reviews Accurate?
When people read Monkey Whizz reviews, they can get misled about what they are actually reading about.
Monkey Whizz is actually one product from a range of four similar synthetic urine products. However, reviews of any of these products tend to call it “Monkey Whizz”, even though only one product in the range is really called by that name.
So what is Monkey Whizz, and how does it compare to the other products sold by the same company? Does Monkey Whizz work, does Monkey Whizz contain creatine and other key chemicals, and how does it stack up against other brands?
What Is Monkey Whizz?
Monkey Whizz is a type of synthetic urine. Monkey Whizz is one product, even though people refer to 4 different products as “Monkey Whizz” in reviews of what they sell.
To be clear, the company is called Serious Monkey Bizzness, and they sell four similar synthetic urine products:
- Monkey urine, which is a container of powdered urine. You have to mix it up, and there is no heat source included. So this is literally something you would mix with warm water to use as a fetish/novelty product. That’s why it’s $15. However, it’s the same urine, just in powder form, if you can get your hands a decent heatpad, it could be a great option.
- Monkey Flask is their urine formula, but premixed. You also get a pair of heatpads. That costs $30.
- Monkey Whizz costs around $45. That has the premixed urine, that comes with 2 slim heat pads, and a belt. The belt contains the premixed urine, and it’s spread out inside the belt so that the maximum amount of liquid can be in contact with the skin, which will keep it warm. The belt also allows you to tuck the slim heatpads inside it, to increase the warmth and insulates the sample.
- The Monkey Dong is the premium product, that contains everything in the Monkey Whizz kit, but also the dispensing tap is in the form of a synthetic penis. Obviously aimed mostly at the fetish market, it can also potentially be used for and observed drug test.
However, you have to have a lot of practice, and some real nerves, to use it for something as important as an observed drug test. I certainly wouldn’t recommend it. A detox drink is a far safer option for an observed drug test.
Monkey Whizz Instructions
Instructions for using Monkey Whizz are in line with most other synthetic urine brands out there because of the use of heatpads. However, where they differ is that you get a belt with Monkey Whizz.
Now I want to talk specifically about the belt in these instructions because I want to tell you how good it is. You’re probably thinking it’s a hassle, and it is.
But the Monkey Whizz belt does three positive things:
- It keeps the urine spread out close to your skin so the temperature is more stable
- It is more discreet and easier to smuggle into the lab than a plastic bottle
- The dispensing tap on the belt means you can dispense it from a natural position
Now it’s going to take some practice using the Monkey Whizz belt, and I’d always advocate you practice a dozen times in the days leading up to your test to make sure all goes smoothly on the day.
In terms of getting the sample to the right temperature, all you have to do is activate the heatpads and slide them into the belt.
With the belt on, with the urine against your skin, and the pads on the other side, that will keep it at the correct temperature. The heatpads are designed to operate at close to 100°F, the upper limit of human urine temperature.
How Does Monkey Whizz Synthetic Urine Compare?
Monkey Whizz is a pretty good synthetic urine. People ask: does Monkey Whizz contain creatine? But that’s not the key question, it’s: does the whole formula work?
Yes, Monkey Whizz does contain creatine. It also contains urea and uric acid. It also at the correct specific gravity range for human urine, as well as the correct pH range.
So it’s going to do a decent job. But it’s not the most complex formula out there. Quick Fix is a more complex formula, Sub Solution is a more complex formula, and Quick Luck is the most complex formula you can buy.
In addition, Sub Solution and Quick Luck don’t use heatpads at all (although Quick Luck includes as an option). They use heat activator powder, which allows close control over the sample temperature.
It doesn’t keep the temperature stable in the same way as the Monkey Whizz belt and pads, but the heat activator powder allows you to react to temperature drops far more quickly, giving you a 100% ability to submit a sample at the correct temperature.
However, Quick Fix and Monkey Whizz in the budget range, under $40, while Sub Solution is $80, and Quick Luck is $100. You get what you pay for, and Monkey Whizz, just like Quick Fix, is only going to be good enough for a basic level drug test.
Does Monkey Whizz Work?
But does Monkey Whizz work? The answer to that question is definitely yes. If you get the temperature range right when you submit it, if you don’t get caught, and as long as it’s only a basic five-panel drug test, then you stand a great chance of passing.
If you’re worried about Monkey Whizz working, then you might want to invest your money in Sub Solution. Even more, the money will get you Quick Luck, and the increase in spending will get you an increase in the quality of the formula in the urine, and the reliability of the heat activator powder over using heatpads.
But yes, Monkey Whizz will work to pass a drug test, but only if it’s a basic level drug test, something like a cheap pre-employment one.
Where To Buy Monkey Whizz
I wouldn’t buy Monkey Whizz from Amazon, or anything like that. Any Monkey Whizz reviews telling you to buy them from dodgy sites should be avoided.
You can buy it from this webshop. These are a reliable third-party retailer who always has fresh stock and fast delivery. I’ve used them a couple of times, and haven’t had any problems getting my order.
So there you go, the conclusion of my Monkey Whizz review is that it’s a decent option. Not a complex formula, but this is compensated for because of the way the belt increases your chances of submitting it within the correct temperature range.